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Keep It 100: Self Reflection in the Time of the ‘Rona

Dear Shameika,
I am at my wits’ end. How in the world do you find your passion? I am 38 years old and I can’t think of one thing I can see myself doing for the rest of my life. I love things but I guess I don’t have the passion for them, if that makes sense. I feel so stuck in life because I end up doing things just because I have to. I want to be happy and productive doing things I love but I’m not sure what that looks like. I have no clue what my purpose is, so how can I figure that out so I can live my best life?
-Seeking Passion and Purpose

Shameika Rhymes

Dear PP,
Let me start off by saying that sometimes it does take a little longer to find your passion. After all, it took me a really long time before I finally figured out why I kept circling back to the same thing. Let’s dig into this shall we? I’m going to Keep it 100 with you. You are not competing with time or anyone else, you are your only competition. So the only way you can discover your passion is to try new things, and I know with the COVID-19 — or “The ‘Rona” as social media has dubbed it — putting a kink in some of that, you are going to have to be creative for the next few weeks.

What is passion? To me, it’s something that you would do even for free. Now, I’m not saying do it for free, but I’m trying to give you the general feeling of how it is to be passionate about something. For me, it was writing, and I did it for free in the beginning and developed it until I could collect my coins.

You have to have the right perspective and attitude; believe that you will find where your passion lies and be open to wherever the road leads you. Talk to people in your circle that are following their passion, and if you look around and there are none, well, honey, you may need to find some new folks to fill that circle with. You can be inspired by them being inspired by their work. Take some free classes online through the library to see if there’s something there that gives you butterflies.

Next, have you made a list to zero in on what things you not only like, but feel passionate about? Is it taking care of the elderly? Writing? Recording TikTok videos in your grown age? No judgement (maybe just a little). Do you enjoy making people laugh, or are you a leader in your church or community? Once you narrow those things down, you might find there are some things that you are passionate about.

Now that you have some things to throw into the mixing bowl, you can try to figure out how to combine everything you love that was on that list under an umbrella. For example, if you love comedy, cooking and helping senior citizens, maybe that means starting a business in which you travel to nursing homes to make the old folks cackle ’til their dentures slip out while providing refreshments. I’ve always heard that if you can’t find the right position or lane, then you need to create one for yourself. Once you do that, analyze how to monetize your passion. Or is this just a hobby? Get realistic about how you can contribute to society and make an impact by turning it into a career if that’s what you want. For some, their passion is a side hustle, not a main gig.

Do some inner work. What do you genuinely like to do? If you still keep coming up with nothing, then there may be some limiting beliefs that you have carried from childhood through your adult years lingering in the back of your mind, telling you what you can’t do. Or maybe it’s a belief that people won’t accept it. Even your subconscious is going to rear its ugly head and try to tell you that you are afraid of 50’levum things, but do not give in to it. Find some affirmations to remind you just how amazing you are and will be in your new found passion!

Throw out all of those limiting beliefs and nagging confidence busters and do you! Nobody ever said the path to finding your passion was easy, but I can vouch that once you do find it, it’s the best feeling ever to see the fruits of your labor … errr … passion take flight. Good luck!

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