The Scanner: Get This Work
WALLED OFF A 29-year-old G4S security officer working at the CATS Transit Center (CTC) in Uptown is probably wishing they’d have their own jail cell built in to the center after one suspect was able to rough up the officer in the worst way even after being taken into custody. According to the report, the suspect was in the waiting area of the CTC when he pushed the security officer, sending the officer into the wall and damn near through it, doing $500 in damage. The officer then reported that after the suspect was in custody, he kicked the officer in the groin.
BUTTERFACE Adding to the list of employees having rough days at work, a 31-year-old McDonald’s employee was also assaulted while working a shift recently. Police reported to a McDonald’s on University City Boulevard at 8 a.m. after a disgruntled customer allegedly threw a breakfast biscuit at the employee, striking her in the left eye. Here’s to hoping they were baked fresh and soft that morning.
BRUSH UP We’ll be forming a jaded employee support group after this month, as yet another woman reported being assaulted at her job on a recent morning. Police reported to a Family Dollar on North Sharon Amity Road just before 10:30 a.m. one recent day after a 29-year-old employee told police that a customer was going to purchase a hairbrush, but ended up throwing it at the employee instead, striking her in her left arm. Thankfully, the woman was not injured.
A BUCK A BULLET Officers filed a found property after a retail employee doing inventory found some merchandise that didn’t belong to the store. According to the report, the employee was cleaning the shelves at a Family Dollar on Bradford Drive when she came across a pile of .22-caliber bullets that someone had stashed behind some other merchandise. The report does not state how many bullets there were, but valued them at $6.
BEER ME A shoplifting suspect in north Charlotte bit off more than they could chew — or drink — last week, and ended up giving up on the crime altogether. Police responded to a damaged property call at a Circle K convenience store on University City Boulevard (a hot spot this week, apparently) after employees said a suspect grabbed four cases of beer and tried to run out with them. Before they could reach the door, the suspect dropped two of the cases on the ground, damaging them. That was enough to shame them into cutting their losses, as the report states that the suspect then put the other cases down and ran out of the store.
THROUGH THE ROOF Staff members at a development company in south Charlotte were flummoxed when they received a package that they hadn’t asked for at their offices recently. According to a report, a package containing $2,000 worth of cocaine was delivered to Marsh Properties LLC on Park Road, and instead of letting this be the beginning of a Breaking Bad-esque story, they simply turned it into the police.
TWILIGHT RETURNS A 37-year-old northeast Charlotte woman (who lives near University City Boulevard, of course) filed a police report recently after another woman allegedly bit her. The victim told police the reason for the assault: She and the suspect have the same boyfriend.
GOFUCKME We cross so many reports of folks getting creative with fraud around Charlotte that it wouldn’t be difficult to create a sister column to The Scanner called The Scammer (light bulb!), but one recent report was a first. A 46-year-old east Charlotte woman filed a report recently stating that someone was using her son’s personal information — not to open a DirecTV account or take out a credit card, but to start a GoFundMe and raise money. The question then becomes: Does he get any of the money?
WINO TOSS Police responded to an assault call at a 7-Eleven on … holy shit it’s University City Boulevard! What the hell is going on … after a customer in the store was attacked by a suspect who was chucking 4 Lokos like ninja stars. A 43-year-old man told police he was in the store when a suspect he had never seen before suddenly threw a $15 bottle of wine at him, breaking it on the floor. When that failed the man also threw cans of 4 Loko at the victim before fleeing the scene.
All Scanner entries are pulled from CMPD reports. Suspects are innocent until proven guilty.

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